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Saturday, September 18, 2010

you are one of ours

little fists holding a cage
eyes fixed
holding back rage

people coming and going
but no one stops
you are their newest little prop
ritual starts and still you are caged
your little eyes watch amazed
people in robes chanting so loud

drums to a beat
they beat so loud
you find yourself banging
your feet to the sound

Suddenly masks appear right in your face
they lift you high
right into space

they spin you this way and that
vomit appears in your throat
you know to not let it go

chanting
dancing
movement
bile

chalices topped up high
this it seems is your turn to shine
lifted in a robe
fully gold

people bowing
moaning
chanting your name

yet your name isnt the same
its a name youhavent heard before
lifted up by strong arms
you stare in his face

its kind and nice
full of grace
he whispers its ok
i wont hurt you

a crown upon his head
he says he rules the earth
and he will make me his

he lowers me gently down
silence all around
he strokes my cheek and says welcome
he turns and suddenly he crouches
i scream a long scream
into the daisies i go
because this man is the devil this i know

Cleo for one of ours

Saturday, September 4, 2010

lonely

im locked up
its cold
its quiet
its painful

curled in a corner
my hands are tied
my naked body
is exposed

i lie waiting for the light
i try to feel
i try
with all my might
but im numb
i feel nothing
my hands are numb
my feet no feeling
my ears are so cold
they feel like theyre screaming
in this place i live
no one knows im there

i live there day by day
unloved unwanted uncared
im a no one
in a world that cant hear
im in pain
in fear
no more tears left
pain too intense.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

a cage childs memory

fists clenched,
scrunched body
face peering
eyes wandering
blue, ice,cold
too cold
four years old
crawling from one space to the other
eyes appearing
angry
mean
mothers voice
hissing
no more moving
no more scraping
i will teach you a lesson bitch
i will teach you now
her eyes turn yellow
her face all veined
ice cold ice cold
i scream and scream
i feel a warmth from deep inside
then i run and hide
i hide in the daisies
i hide in the fields
i hide where no one can
find me
when i come back my hands
they scrunch up
my feet burn
like fire
the mother
she smiles
she laughs
she screams
then what happens next
i know is obscene
cause i can
hear the next ones screams
a cage child yet un named written by Cleo

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

the night aint ova jus yit

scrubbing the walls
so much red
got to get it done
well befoe bed

my hands are sore
my body cold
i beg my mind
to say its ok

jesus sign next to my scrubbing
i want ti done before
i start
to start sobbing

jesus loves
this is what it says
yet i know
my pain leaves that jesus in bed

he dont know me
how could he
cause i the
kid who says no to him

the red all goen now
yet i covered in shit
don matta what i do
this night aint ended jus yit

Sunday, April 18, 2010

the donut

The donut

I was seven/eight years old
it was such a treat
we were visiting a market
it was filled whole streets

This was never allowed just me and dad
not unless id done something really really bad
but this time was fun
we looked at things
and tasted the food

little did i know
he was getting me in the mood
i tugged his sleeve and said
please please dad
donuts

he looked at me and said soon
first i have to take you
to a special room
remember the donuts smell
remember it well
you will rewarded
with as many as they can sell

he took me to a man
he didnt say a name
but i guess so used to it
they all sounded the same

my dad parted me with a kiss on the cheek
he reminded me what i was supposed to do
and i watched him depart
i felt like a monkey in a zoo

hours later my job was done
i walked slightly bow legged
i felt like scum
we stood at the donut van
he ruffled my hair and he said

hey my good man my daughter over there
well she sure is tired
and need a cheery up
how about you cook her twelve
and add one in for good luck

I chomped on those donuts
i relished them all
i had done
what was asked
and i swallowed and all

Hand me rounds (with Josies help)

Thursday, March 25, 2010

the box

its dark
its cold
its a long long nite

i tri to hide
but i cant
them peple
they take me ote

tey pont to the ski
an sai
im his tonite

swirlin mist
it creeps in
covers me
in mi sin

a box
a lid
a smel
a fear

creakin open
arond the mist
i smel it
before it opens

they lay me down
my hands
cris crosed
an they put rite there
in that box

the smel
the gore
the breakin sound
and al the time the mistal round

the lid it goes on
ifeel so sik
plese anione no
i don wan this

christine

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

vomit trigerring

bend down
fingers down throat
push hard
now heave ho

i SURGE
I GURGE
I FEEL IT COME

it purges deep within
and makes me clean
its
my vile by bile

its my past
all in spew
it makes me forget
what went on

the times they
raped me bent
over this horrible sink
my vomit made them happy

as i spewed
they came inside me
one after one

when it was done
they scooped it up
and slurped my spew stuff

FAU